Not all of us had a carefree childhood. Life can be harsh for some us but amidst all that, there were carefree days sprinkled in here and there.
The older I get, the more I realize, I do not like being the adult that the world wants me to be today. Maintain a 40 plus hours a week at a career, not just a job, raise a family, be involved in just about everything and everyone in the family has to too. Keep a spotless house at all times, trim the lawn so it's not an "eyesore" and so much more!! Its exhausting just typing all this, never mind actually doing all this stuff!!
We do, do it though, don't we? We want to be the perfect parents to our kids, prefect career, perfect community advocate, and so on. Today's world wants us to be the best of the best. Always Striving for PERFECTION. The perfectly manicured lawn, the perfect well-rounded kids in school with activities, the perfect volunteer, and the perfect career. How boring!!! How ADULTY of us.
My parents were not perfect in raising us. I think my parents main goal with me, was to raise a child who would survive childhood first. To say that I was accident prone, would be putting it mildly. Broken bones, bruises and needing stitches was the norm for me. I was a bit of a tomboy and yes I could and did climb trees, worked on cars with my dad, split wood and all that manly stuff. I didn't have any brothers just sisters. Three of them to be exact. 4 girls. 3 of us would help dad outside with yardwork and we all learned quite a bit by doing so. We also had chores inside the house, but we would always look for an out. I mean, who wants to vacuum or do the dishes when you could be outside all day? No brainer for us.
While we knew how to do housework. Working outside with our dad taught us so much more about the world. It was simple really. We learned that in order to have the freshest n healthiest food, we needed to grow a garden and cook from scratch. How to make that food last all winter by canning it and freezing it. Homemade sauce was the best and to this day, it is how it's made, not bought, in my house. How you need to plan your meals for the family and include work lunches. How hanging laundry outside gave it a fresh smell. Still the best sheets to sleep on to this day!!! To really understand how the vehicle you drove worked, you had to be able to maintain it. Not just put gas in it and go. Change the oil regularly, change a tire, change brakes and check all fluids. (I still remember when I was a teen and a bunch of my friends and I were out driving around on a Friday night and we got a flat tire. The guys and girls were like who is gonna change the tire? While they were deciding, I was already pulling out the spare and the jack. It wasn't until I got the lug nuts off, the guys were like hey we got it from here. I cannot tell how satisfying that moment was for me.) How to price parts and know when it was too big of a job and needed to be brought to someone who knew how to fix it but be wise enough to know what the cost should be.
All valuable lessons we all should learn in life. Teach our kids. We have become to self-reliant of everything that society has to offer us, that we forget that society does not have our best interests at heart. Obesity is a huge problem with our young people. Using their imaginations for some is a major problem among our youth of today. These two problems alone would not be an issue today if we still believed in what our society was like 40 or so years ago. By doing yard work, we learned (although we didn't know it at the time) to work as a family together, taking pride in doing a job with our own hands, and providing for each other.
To become self reliant on our own resources and not just what society has to offer us. Not just having kids and a marriage, but having a family and what that really means. Helping, providing for, allowing each to grow to who they are meant to be and always being there for each other. Sitting at the dinner table each night, if possible, as a family. We were told no, and often. Most of us weren't spoiled kids who got everything right in the moment that we wanted it. We had to work for it. Want a car? Go out and get a job first. Save up your money and pay for it. Which meant, insurance, taxes, and all expenses. Want to drive our car? Get good grades and show responsibility. It is a privilege not a right when you turn 16. We all had curfews and obeyed them. We had choices and were given consequences to those choices that we made. The dreaded family vacations each summer. Ugh. As a teen I hated them. Spend a whole week with my family??? What are you freakin crazy???
Well those weeks gave me some of the best times of my childhood. Traveling to different states, beaches, and camping. I bonded with my sisters. Had fun with my parents. It also gave me a love for beaches and the outdoors that I am glad I am able to share with my kids.
Playing outside with my friends gave us imagination and creativity. We explored our neighborhoods and a few other ones close by. Summertime meant being able to ride our bikes everywhere we wanted to go. To the pond to skip stones and listen to music. To the lake to swim and hang out. The pizza parlor for a slice and a video game. To a friends house to watch movies that we probably shouldn't of and gave us nightmares for many nights afterwards.
I get that we didn't have the responsibilities of being the head of the household and the worries that come with being a parent. But that is the point. We had the responsibility of being a kid. Free to roam and explore. Free to have fun. Free to just be a kid. We weren't worried about how many likes we got on a pic. Who is posting a bad pic from a party that we shouldn't of been at. How many obligations we had to keep up with during the week and weekends. Most of us weren't over scheduled. Parents showed up to the game. Work understood that family came first. We didn't rely on technology to entertain or tell us what to do. Sure we had kids that were obese but compared to today's kids, it wasn't really noticeable and it certainly was not a problem that was concerning.
I loved things that I was brought up with. I still carry those things in my heart. I try to instill them in my kids (it has become more of a struggle, as I am a minority, but I stick with it) It has made me who I am. My childhood was not perfect in any way. I have some deep personal scars from that time. I am able to just have scars though, because when you have a well rounded upbringing, you learn not to judge people, how to help others, not be selfish, be a team player, what family means and how to provide for yourself. You actually learn all about life during this time. Think about that.
No classroom, extra activity and money will teach you those things. If we continue to allow our kids of today, to stay focused on electronics and give in to them, instead of what playing outside and being a real family is about. What it really means to be a kid. To learn to think for themselves. Being creative. Being free to be just a kid. We are killing their childhood and then their chance at changing this world we live in today.
And that is a world that I am afraid of. It is a world that I think my grandchildren will be raised in. They will only hear of stories of the older days of hardworking grandparents. I am afraid that they will only feel sorry for us.
We all need men in suits and men in blue jeans to run this world.
We just need the men in suits to remember where they came from.
Do you?
Until next time,
~It is what it is~
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